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In what way do parents misuse and misunderstand "time-outs"? |
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A "time-out" period is not about taking a child to her room as punishment. It's a method of avoiding a full-scale battle, a time away from the heat of the moment; away from the situation that's causing the problem. A proper time-out helps toddlers regain control over their emotions and prevent parents from accidentally reinforcing the bad behavior. And, with toddlers, you have to be present for the time out. If you simply place your child in a corner, or send her to her room, and walk away, you're not supporting the lesson you're trying to teach. You're not seeing it through. Rather than shaming your child, and saying, "You naughty person, you have to suffer this alone, you can't be around others," I advise parents to stay with their toddler through the time-out so that the child gets to see the parents are in charge and emotionally involved
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What do you want readers to get out of this book? |
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I want parents to come away from this book with a feeling of empowerment. I want them to be able to say, "We can do this. This isn't something that we're going to go blindly forward on. We've got some tools now. Let's put them into practice." I also hope this book give them the ability to think before they act--to become what I call "conscious parents." Even more important than the information and skills parents can learn here, I hope this book gives them confidence in themselves, in their intuitive feelings, and in their own abilities to solve problems. The more parents begin to see that they can understand and meet their toddler's needs, the better they'll become at doing so.
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