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What do you think will most surprise readers of this book? |
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It's hard to predict what exactly will surprise individual readers but I can virtually guarantee that at some point in the book most parents will experience what I call "a light-bulb moment" where they'll say, "Gosh, that makes sense, and I can actually put it into practice in an every-day situation. I can have control as a parent." In general I think parents will be surprised at the extent to which this book provokes positive thoughts, and applies common sense, when dealing with or preventing difficult toddler situations.
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Most people hear the acronym T.L.C. and think "Tender Loving Care." What does T.L.C. mean to you? |
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The letters serve as a reminder to parents of the key elements of communication: Talk, Listen and Clarify. In order to encourage speech in their toddlers, so they can communicate better and lower their frustration, parents need to talk to their kids about everything and anything. Describe your day, his activities, things in the immediate environment, and so on. Maintain a running dialogue with your toddler. Then, listen attentively to your toddler's expressions--both verbal and nonverbal--so that he feels heard and also learns how to be attentive himself. Finally, clarify by repeating the correct word or expanding on ideas (without scolding or making your child feel that his speech is "wrong.")
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What's the biggest mistake parents make when helping their toddlers rehearse life skills? |
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The biggest mistake parents make is in not setting clear boundaries. Saying no doesn't mean you don't love your child. In fact, what you're doing when you say no is preparing and teaching your child to accept disappointment. Not too long ago I worked with two working parents who felt guilty about working and desperately wanted to make sure their child loved them more than he loved his nanny. As a result they tended to overcompensate when they got home from work, allowing him what they called "freedom". As a result they often had a hard time saying no to their son. Believe me, as soon as that toddler gets into the real world, the first time he faces a teacher who says no, he'll be in for a major letdown. I used to say to my daughters, "When I say no it's because I love you." To me, love means giving another human being an example of how you wish to be treated.
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